I Promise it is OK to Sit in Silence - I’ve found that more and more people seem to have grown uncomfortable with silence. I revel in it. I embrace it, I love it, it feeds me, and I need it. I realize that not everyone is like this and I respect that but…sometimes, it is nice to just sit in silence with another person. You don’t have to always talk, it’s unnecessary and a lot of times it ruins the mood. People are afraid of their thoughts and feelings and use small talk and “noise” to escape them, stop.
Not Everything Has to be Profound - I enjoy trashy TV, I enjoy good bubblegum pop music, I enjoy Disney movies but I also enjoy diagramming sentences, reading 100+ books in a year, having analytical conversations on a number of different topics, AND ALL OF THIS IS PERFECTLY FINE. I’ve noticed (usually through social media) that a lot of you seem to turn your nose up at anything you deem trivial and not profound enough for your time. As if you don’t occasionally enjoy a good One Direction song or ridiculous reality TV show. Not all music must have a deep message and not all time spent in front of the TV must be devoted to news. Entertainment is supposed to be entertaining and as long as the person partaking in it is enjoying their experience, why do you care?
It is OK to be vocal about your feelings…Just Don’t Expect Anyone to Care - This is something that is very personal to me because by now I’m sure you can tell I’m a very vocal person. I express what I’m feeling when I’m feeling it and I have very real reactions to things. If I hate something, you know it and if I love it, you know it. There isn’t usually an in between and that’s fine with me. I have noticed that a lot of times when I’m experiencing sadness or rage people get uncomfortable and I believe it’s because we are conditioned to internalize any and all negative feelings. You share the good but never the bad and especially when dealing with Facebook/Twitter/etc… you make your life look as great as possible, regardless of whether or not that is true. I just want to remind you that, that is bullsh*t. If you want to take your 140 characters to rant about the horrible day you had, do it. That is how you are feeling and you should be true to your feelings. I think that’s a wonderful part of social media and I embrace it. I never go back and delete tweets or blog posts because regardless of how I feel afterwards, during the time I wrote them that was how I was feeling. I own the feelings even if they aren’t happy or “socially acceptable”; they are mine.
That being said, don’t expect anyone to care about what you’re feeling. I think one of my best and worst qualities is that for the most part, I honestly do not care what anyone thinks about what I do or say and I don’t care what others are doing or say. If you are posting statuses and tweets and blogs just for a reaction from others, you’re doing it wrong. You will probably never get the reaction you want or feel you deserve and you’ll probably end up driving yourself mad. So say exactly what you want to say but don’t really expect or think anyone should care about it…because they most likely will not.
You Don’t Have to Like it Because Everyone Else Does…but You Also Don’t Have to Hate It - Alright, this is one of those things I’m guilty of as well (hey we’re all friends here, I can admit my flaws too!) and I hope to work on it. I have this problem where I immediately shy away from anything that what I call “the masses” loves. I did it with Kendrick Lamar, Fifty Shades of Grey, Sons of Anarchy, and Homeland (just to name a few) and in all of these cases after actually checking the book/show/artist out, I ended up either loving or liking it. Still, there are a lot of times that doesn’t happen. I still don’t get the Frank Ocean thing, I think Boardwalk Empire is boring and overrated, etc… and whenever I express such viewpoints I’m usually called a hater. Why???
My boyfriend thinks I go out of my way to hate anything that the majority of people like and let me clear this up right now, that is not the case. I watch shows like Catfish so clearly I don’t think I stand on any sophisticated media high ground; I simply refuse to love something because I’m supposed to. I will never be that person and that is fine. That being said, I don’t go out of my way to hate something because everyone loves it either, I just like think that the fact that some things aren’t well known makes them more special. I loved Celine bags before people really even knew who they were and now they’re everywhere so my love is kind of dying. I loved The Weeknd back when his shows were around 15 bucks and he didn’t have singles on the radio. The fact that smaller numbers knew about something made me feel like I was part of something special.
Still, I do want to work on my immediate reaction of not giving something a chance because everyone loves it, I’m just always going to be one of those “don’t believe the hype” people and I don’t ever really see that changing.
Stop Telling People “It Could Be Worse”, They Know - This irks me so much, SO MUCH. You have someone sharing their feelings (see above) and explaining that they’re having a crappy day and here comes the “it could be worse” person. You know what? We are aware!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes you could be homeless, yes you could have no job, yes you could be missing a leg, yes you could have never tasted all the deliciousness bacon has to offer; WE GET ALL OF THAT but still, that doesn’t mean I didn’t have a really bad day. Sometimes, all people are looking for is a little bit of empathy or someone to sit quietly and let them vent.
So just so we’re clear, we all know it could be worse but if someone is having a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day…let them vent without telling them so.
And lastly, this gem I found over at Terrible Twenties (love her blog btw)
“The median age of our planet is about 28, so something on the order of a billion people fall within the Millenial or Generation Y demographic.”
You are not special. I mean to certain people you are and that’s a lovely, lovely thing but in the grand scheme of things, you are not. So stop spouting philosophical tweets and statuses that you copy and pasted together from various authors and great people from the past and passed off as your own (you thought I didn’t notice?). Stop acting like your opinion is any better than anyone else’s. Stop judging people for every little thing they say or do, as if you have never said or done anything to annoy someone else. Stop turning your nose up at things people say that you deem unworthy of your alleged awesomeness. Stop thinking of yourself as God’s gift to social media and your friends. Basically, let go of your delusions of grandeur because they will be your downfall.
And like Heather says, Sorry folks, the numbers don’t lie. None of us is particularly unique or special. I’m just one in a billion, and so are you.